The Best Air
UNESCO says the air on the Brazilian archipelago Fernando de Noronha is the second-purest on earth, after the Arctic. It's a marine sanctuary with water visibility up to 50 metres and pristine beaches at the end of sandy lanes. Stay at Maravilha (pousadamaravilha.com.br)-just eight simple-chic rooms (three apartments, five bungalows) and a staff of45 to look after 16 guests. Dolphins may be your only swimming companions, the beach empty but for a shack selling coconuts and caipirinhas. Chill.

The Best Bloody Mary
Francisco D'Souza is your barman at Fort Tiracol, Goa (se The Next Big Thing, Page 108). His Bloody Mary is only reachable by ferry; it would be worth swimming there for the immaculate chilled glass, rimmed with salt (so classy), spicy to perfection, Uncontaminated by ice (hateful to BM enthusiasts, since it displaces the alcohol, scary for the India-nervous, who think every ice cube is a tummy grenade). Bloody Marys are a big Indian specialty, and Francisco's gentle professionalism is proof that you can travel hopefully and arrive to perfection in his little bar with sublime views of sea, sand and sun at this boutique hotel.

The Best Mountain Hut
This is the high life: a Himalayan trek in untouched forest to 360˚Leti (black tomato.co.uk; see Secret Agents, page 14). Just four rooms built into the mountainside, with glass-paneled walls and private decks with fireplaces, Hot water bottles at night, steaming-hot early morning tea, wonderful walks, wine and food. Made it, Ma! Top of the world!

 The Best Butler

 The butler in hotels went way out of control, with white-gloved flunkeys hosing one down with Evian on the beach and shimmering into bathroom with champagne as one was shaving one's legs. Georggette Hedge at the Oberoi, Mumbai (oberoimumbai.com), is the antithesis of intrusive. She's a pocket Jeeves, in tie and tails. And telepathic. She's perfected the art of being there when needed and invisible when not, of supersonic pressing, efficient packing and unpacking. She'll take one shopping; she's a nanny; she produces adaptor plugs, phone chargers and hot-water bottles like a conjuror. Yor've a little cold? She slips Kleenexes into your bag. Georgette, who looks after the best suites at this immaculate hotel on the Queen's Necklace, stays with one throughtout a visit (obviating the butler scam of getting used to, and blindly tipping, several people) on 24-hour call: "I sleep when you sleep. I am awake when you are awake." One day she'll be packed up and taken home by a needy guest.



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 |VANITY FAIR ON TRAVEL| www.vanityfair.co.uk                                                                          APRIL 2008